Love = Fairness? | Friday, September 09, 2005
LOVE=FAIRNESS?
I have been thinking for a long time as in the definition of love. I was thinking along these lines that if I love someone, I would wait for her and desire the best for her and be supportive of the things of whatever she wants to do, comfort her when she is feeling down and just be a quiet confidant besides her. Of course, it matters to me that she would love me the way as I love her but to me, that is no longer that important though I admit in the past, it used to matter to me very much.
She has expressed to me at least twice that it would be very unfair of her to make me wait for her and some of my closest relatives have also told me this and one of the church leaders has also told her to be fair to me. Thus, this is what has gotten me thinking along those lines. I remember that I have told her in the past and even recently that it is my time and I can choose of how I want to spend it and that she should not feel bad because this is my decision. I was thinking that to be fair to me means that I need to distance myself from her and to mix with the other girls; in other words to move on with my life, I only have this to say that my desire is to love the girl who has captivated my heart in her love for God that has touched my heart that I have never knew before and still do, I will still wait patiently for her.
You may say that it is very unfair of her and you may also say that I am foolish but I was just thinking of Jesus. Of course, I am not comparing myself with Him and neither am I worthy to compare myself with Him. Jesus Himself has chosen to come down to this earth for He loved us and gave Himself to death to redeem us from sin and evil. When he hung on the cross, humiliated and dying, his closest disciples fled away from him, none dared to confess Him as Lord and Master, and one has denied Him publicly three times and one has betrayed Him and many who passed Him by cursed Him and wanted Him dead. I was very touched by this statement that Jesus has prayed when all these things must have played in his mind when He hung there dying, "Forgive them for they know not what they are doing." Why would Jesus say this? Wasn't He hurt by the rejection of the creatures whom He has created? I believed He was for He chose to love them and in the end, ended up rejected by those whom He chose to love. Is it fair to Jesus? I personally think not and yet this is true even today that HE loves us and willingly gave up His life for us all that we can be reconciled with God the Father even while we were yet sinners.
Thus, I come to the conclusion that love can never be equalled with fairness. What is fairness? Can we ever be fair? I think not for we are all sinners and our concepts of fairness has been tainted with sin. When we try to be fair to our children, they would always feel unjustified and felt that you are unfair and that you tend to favor your favored child. Thus, my decision is that I choose to love someone and of course, I hope that she will reciprocate my love but even if she does not, sad I will be of course but also this is my choice to love her and to wait patiently for her. I do not want to pressure her and neither do I want to hear someone telling me to move on with my life, I believe that even when she is old and wrinkled or maybe I will be in other countries serving God in whatever capacity, I will still wait for my eyes and mind has this image of a very beautiful girl, loving God with all of her heart, soul, mind and strength and expressing this love in her worship and most importantly, her life and that is why I believe I will wait until the day God calls me home. It is no longer a question of fairness but rather a choice of the lover who has chosen. That is all I have to say on this subject and it doesn't matter whether you agree or disagree for it is a personal choice.
God Bless
Created at 12:52 AM
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Name: Joseph Chia
Age: 28
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